Aurora 4x

Fiction => Þórgrímr's Fiction => Roman => Topic started by: Þórgrímr on September 14, 2009, 03:04:08 PM

Title: A New Version for A Test of Wills: Discovery
Post by: Þórgrímr on September 14, 2009, 03:04:08 PM
I have begun a rewrtie of my first Test of Wills story to bring it inline with the canon that has been established in the later stories. What this thread is for is to see if there is any interest in reading the new version. If not, there is no reason for me to post it here since I NEED feedback to improve it.

I have in mind a certain number of votes in the poll that are needed to meet the requiste interest in this project.

The reason I am doing it this way is the absolute underwhelming number of replies for the story I am posting in the BTS! forum. As a writer I need feedback to improve the stories, and that is the one thing I am not getting.

I will let this poll run for seven days, and next Monday we will see what we see.  :wink:



Cheers, Þórgrímr
Title: Re: A New Version for A Test of Wills: Discovery
Post by: alexwildstar on September 14, 2009, 06:45:28 PM
yeah I liked the earlier story and hated the fact that it ended.
Title: Re: A New Version for A Test of Wills: Discovery
Post by: Beersatron on September 14, 2009, 11:21:22 PM
Do you have an order of reading for the threads in this sub-forum? I must admit that I have never looked in here before!
Title: Re: A New Version for A Test of Wills: Discovery
Post by: Þórgrímr on September 15, 2009, 01:03:22 AM
Quote from: "Beersatron"
Do you have an order of reading for the threads in this sub-forum? I must admit that I have never looked in here before!

The way I wrote the stories was Assault of the IV Ala, The Siliconate War: Damnatio Et Memoriae, Then A Test of Wills: Discovery, and then A Test of Wills: The Time of Fire.

But this is not in chronological order. Just the way I wrote them.  :D

@alexwildstar, that is one of the problems corrected with this version. It is quite a bit longer and more detailed.  :D



Cheers, Thor
Title: Re: A New Version for A Test of Wills: Discovery
Post by: Beersatron on September 15, 2009, 08:08:20 AM
Quote from: "Þórgrímr"
Quote from: "Beersatron"
Do you have an order of reading for the threads in this sub-forum? I must admit that I have never looked in here before!

The way I wrote the stories was Assault of the IV Ala, The Siliconate War: Damnatio Et Memoriae, Then A Test of Wills: Discovery, and then A Test of Wills: The Time of Fire.

But this is not in chronological order. Just the way I wrote them.  :D  One of the reasons for the rewrite is that in the later stories I was constrained to a very short period of time due to when I had the Romans gaining spaceflight. Well, in the new version the time constraint is not there and I can fit Assault and Siliconate in the timeline. And the rewrite also brings this story inline with the new canon.

So far the new rewrite is up to 116 pages and as far as I am concerned, just barely begun. It adds a lot of to the UST background and the new meeting between the Romans and Terrans now occurs in a far different situation.  :D

@alexwildstar, that is one of the problems corrected with this version. It is quite a bit longer and more detailed.  :D



Cheers, Thor

Ok, so I will wait for the Test of Wills rewrite?
Title: Re: A New Version for A Test of Wills: Discovery
Post by: Þórgrímr on September 15, 2009, 01:28:50 PM
Quote from: "Beersatron"
Ok, so I will wait for the Test of Wills rewrite?

Well, you could read the older one to compare, and read the others and comment on them.  :wink:



Cheers, Thor
Title: Re: A New Version for A Test of Wills: Discovery
Post by: Sotak246 on September 15, 2009, 09:36:47 PM
I loved your earlier versions and am egerly awaiting your newest rewrite.   Done yet?....How about now?....sigh...guess I can be a bit more paitent. :)
Title: Re: A New Version for A Test of Wills: Discovery
Post by: alexwildstar on September 16, 2009, 02:33:23 PM
WWWOOOOOTTTT  


I look forward to the reading the new stuff.    

OH and all you other writers back to the keyboard and start typing :-)
Title: Re: A New Version for A Test of Wills: Discovery
Post by: ShadoCat on September 16, 2009, 05:05:00 PM
I'm glad you're continuing this.  I've missed it.

I suppose I can wait for the rewrite. :)
Title: Re: A New Version for A Test of Wills: Discovery
Post by: Þórgrímr on September 17, 2009, 12:08:42 AM
Quote from: "ShadoCat"
I'm glad you're continuing this.  I've missed it.

I suppose I can wait for the rewrite. :wink:  The Prologue and Chapter one are mainly to establish how and when the Romans make it into space. Chapter two is where the entirely new stuff begins.  :wink:



Cheers, Thor
Title: Re: A New Version for A Test of Wills: Discovery
Post by: IanD on September 17, 2009, 07:15:41 AM
Quote from: "Þórgrímr"
The reason I am doing it this way is the absolute underwhelming number of replies for the story I am posting in the BTS! forum. As a writer I need feedback to improve the stories, and that is the one thing I am not getting.

Just because I don't comment on your stories doesn't mean I don't read them! Perhaps the number of views would be more informative than the number of comments?

Regards
Title: Re: A New Version for A Test of Wills: Discovery
Post by: Þórgrímr on September 17, 2009, 01:23:25 PM
Quote from: "IanD"
Just because I don't comment on your stories doesn't mean I don't read them! Perhaps the number of views would be more informative than the number of comments?

Regards

I know folks were reading my stories, that is not the item in question. What is is feedback. As any writer will tell you they need feedback and having either a dedicated set of beta readers or lots of commentary is critical to knowing what does and does not work in the story. So feedback is critical and what I am in search of.  :wink:



Cheers, Thor
Title: Re: A New Version for A Test of Wills: Discovery
Post by: Hawkeye on September 17, 2009, 02:09:43 PM
I have read all of you stories and was ready to go up the wall when it ended suddenly and left me guessing.

As for telling you what doesn´t work, well, I realy don´t feel qualified to do that.

Ralph Hoenig, Germany
Title: Re: A New Version for A Test of Wills: Discovery
Post by: Þórgrímr on September 17, 2009, 03:01:47 PM
Quote from: "Hawkeye"
I have read all of you stories and was ready to go up the wall when it ended suddenly and left me guessing.

As for telling you what doesn´t work, well, I realy don´t feel qualified to do that.

Ralph Hoenig, Germany

Hawkeye, I am happy you like the stories, but as far as I am concerned, you are qualified to comment. This board is populated by intelligent folks, and that means we all know what sounds logical, plausible, and above all reasonable. So if you have an opinion on something that does not quite ring true to you, please, by all means, throw in your two cents.

And in the new version since I am not too familiar with large European research labs beyond CERN I will need input by the rest of the planet as to research labs, corporations, and any other details that may be missing, but required to get the global feel I am shooting for in this story.  :D



Cheers, Thor
Title: Re: A New Version for A Test of Wills: Discovery
Post by: Haegan2005 on September 17, 2009, 11:54:05 PM
Not being a disinterested observer(I get to read them before he posts them!) I must say that his writing has improved greatly over the past 2 years that I have been greedily reading up his novels. He has flowed from mostly action oriented to truly plot and character driven stories. The characters have developed deeper personalities and even histories that form the whys and whats of the characters choices.

I can honestly say, that this rewrite is a notable improvement over the original. The atmosphere of the novel is much more tense and is a real page clicker! LOL, naturally, he will clean it up a bit more before beginning to post it, but it will be worth the wait. Trust me on this.
Title: Re: A New Version for A Test of Wills: Discovery
Post by: Þórgrímr on September 22, 2009, 10:34:22 AM
First off, I apologize for the delay. I had a chance to go visit my son in another state on Saturday so I leapt at the opportunity. I just got back today.  :D

Due to the overwhelming request to post everything I have written and if Eric will create a Post Apoc fora here in my writing fora I will begin posting my Post Apoc stories to.



Cheers, Thor
Title: Re: A New Version for A Test of Wills: Discovery
Post by: ShadoCat on September 22, 2009, 10:58:28 AM
Quote from: "Þórgrímr"
First off, I apologize for the delay. I had a chance to go visit my son in another state on Saturday so I leapt at the opportunity. I just got back today.  :oops:

Family First!

Quote from: "Þórgrímr"
Second, the poll met the minimum reqs for posting the new version so I will get that up later today.  :D

What the heck was your threshold?  Everyone said some version of "yes".  <grin>

Quote from: "Þórgrímr"
Due to the overwhelming request to post everything I have written and if Eric will create a Post Apoc fora here in my writing fora I will begin posting my Post Apoc stories to.

Cool!
Title: Re: A New Version for A Test of Wills: Discovery
Post by: Þórgrímr on September 22, 2009, 11:16:33 AM
@ ShadoCat, to be honest it was just fifteen positive responses. And to be honest I am stunned, and humbled, by the post everything votes!  :shock:



Cheers, Thor
Title: Re: A New Version for A Test of Wills: Discovery
Post by: mavikfelna on September 22, 2009, 12:46:17 PM
Yes, we like your stories. You write very well and your setups and characters are interesting and well built.
Keep up the good work.

--Mav