Unfortunately, as you noted, the 'RP' in 'MMORPG' tends to use the 'stat-based and experience/loot hoarding' meaning as in Monty Haul campaigns or console roleplaying games ala Final Fantasy and such. Even smaller, niche-er MMOs tend to attract the gamist types rather than anyone interested in playing a role.
On the subject of 'pen and paper' games online, my virtual tabletop of choice (when I do manage to scare up a group willing to commit to a real-time campaign) is
Maptools, which is free and highly customizable. Of course there's a learning curve and it can be a bit finicky, but hey, this is the Aurora forums, heh. There's also plenty of community-made add-ons and such that provide a framework for playing anything from GURPS to the Warhammer 40k RPGs.
Those with a time and the will to do so can also use programs like IRC, Skype, and the numerous white-board services out there to run a game as well; I even use Google spreadsheets as a rough tactical map for a Dungeons & Dragons campaign I run.
Another option for scratching the roleplaying itch is play-by-post where games are run via forums; obviously supports a different pace than face-to-face or real time interactions, but for those who like to write it can be fun in and of itself. The folks at
Paizo have a thriving community (where people also recruit for virtual tabletops), although there is an obvious bias towards their own Pathfinder RPG. That said the community is filled with folks of all stripes and I've seen Warhammer, D20 Modern, Call of Cthulhu (the basic roleplaying version), Star Wars SAGA and all sorts of other systems played. Similar sites are
Myth Weavers and
D&D Online Games.
The main downside is that a lot of folk think they're more interested in it than they really are so the attrition rate is quite high, but if you can get a group of strangers who're willing to pretend they're dwarves (or elves or orcs Eldar or vulcans or Jedi...) for a few minutes a day it can be a rewarding exercise.