Frankly, I really fail to see the problem.
As said before, missiles are ridiculously good early on in the game. For a long time in fact. Also, the AI simply can't deal with missiles, let alone box launchers. If you use box launchers against the AI, you might as well play without any sort of enemies because it's just a "I win" button. I don't use reduced size/box launchers at all in fact, specifically because the AI is completely hapless before them.
I understand it is different if you play multiple factions, but I still fail to see the problems. There are reliable countemeasures to missiles. So what? In war, even in recent and modern wars, it came down to who has the most powerful military. I see no problem in there being effective counters to missiles. In fact, even in modern war, there ARE effective counters to missiles. AMM batteries ARE a reality for great military powers nowadays. It's just that usually, because of geopolitical considerations, any war in the last 30 years was between a huge nation and piddling dictators, so you saw none of these used.
So what happens when 2 nations of similar powers and similar technology level battle it out? The larger, more numerous side wins, it become a war of attrition. And so it's perfectly reasonable that you have to shoot until the enemy runs out of AMM. There are effective counters to missiles now, I can't see how there COULD NOT be even more effective counters in the future. If you want to win against a similar opponent, bring more ships.
Regarding your complain about energy weapons having a clear winner and loser... Yes it's exactly as you say. If you are faster and have longer range, you have won. As it should be. As it has always been in real life. If you do not have a longer range of the enemy, then you have to be faster so you can close in or else you die. This has been the basis of war since the first spears and bows. What is so strange about it?
You say there is no clever tactics in that. I will contest your point. Clever tactics is NOT having a weapon that for some reason the enemy cannot counter or intercept. That is called technological superiority, not clever tactics.
Clever tactics is attacking where the enemy can't defend. Clever tactics is forcing the enemy to split hiss forces. Clever tactics is blockading planets or systems, or taking out supply lines. Or luring the enemy in a trap. That is clever tactics and clever strategy. Having a better weapon system than the enemy is NOT tactics.